Dr: Ab tabiyat kaisi hai?
Santa: Pehle se zyada khrab hai.
D: Dawai khali thi kya?
S: Nahi dawai ki botal to bhari hui thi.
D: mera matlab hai dawai le li thi?
S: Ji jab aapne di to maine le li.
D:Bewkuf, dawai pee li thi?
S:Nahi,dawai to laal thi.
D:Haramjade dawai ko pee lia tha?
S:Nahi dr sahab "peelia" toh mujhe tha.
D:Are gadhe,suar,kutte,sirf itna batade dawai ko muh me dali thi ya nahi?
S:Toh aur kaha dalni thi ?;-)
Khushiya dene walo me ek naam apka hai,
Sath dene walo me 1 naam apka hai,
Sab kuch bhula diya hamne,
Jo na bhula sake wo ek naam apka h.
Girls save their bf ph no. as
jaanu
sweeetu
mithu or my luv.
Boys save their gf ph no. as
bhinda mechanic,
Raju plumber,
bholla dudh wala,kallu mistri..
Joke From Electric Signboard on transformers:
Danger!
11000 volts!
Anyone found touching will be jailed for 3 years.
Females keep on saying,"ALL MEN ARE THE SAME"
I Say,
If all men are the same, why do women take so long to choose one ?
Hai koi jawaab? ;)
Khali jagah bharo..
____ Land ____ par ___ Choot.
Shaitani dimag mujhe pata hai tum galat hi soch rahe ho..
.
.
.
Ans is: BSNL Land Line Par Bhari Choot.
True lines:-
"Still cant undrstand why we choose the wrong people in d first place n then when the right person arrives, we just stop trusting people.!"...
Santa and Banta in a discussion. Santa: If I drink coffee, I can't sleep. Banta: With me it`s the opposite. If I sleep, I can`t drink coffee.
Aashik puchya rab nu tu jag nu pyr da mela kyun bna dita, rab hasya te bolya, tusi keda mere naal changi kiti, tusi to yr nu hi rab bna dita
There is no definition for a good day or a bad day..
it all depends on you & your thoughts that,
Either U rule the day or the day Rules U......
A nxt generatn nursery rhyme: "johny johny yes papa! using facebuk? yo papa! pasing cmts? lol papa
gtng likes? wow paPa
what's ur relatonship status?
Hahaha:
Sad lovestory. 1 ldki thi or uska b.f tha.
Wo apne b.f se bahut pyar karti thi.1 din usne apne b.f se kaha tum mere bina 1 din bita ke dikhao.
B.f ne ye challange except kiya usne apni g.f k bina pura 1 din bitaya or wo jeet gaya.Dusre din khushi se wo g.f se milne gya to wo mar chuki thi kyuki use cancer tha or uske pas 1 hi din tha.
Usne b.f K Liye 1 Letter diya tha.
Usne leter me likha tha "i know u will do it.kya tum mere liye ye roz karogy ?
Bus Me 1 Ladki Aapne Piche Khade Ladke Se Boli -
'Bus Me Hum Dono Ke Khade hone Ke Layak Bhi Jagah Nahi Hai, To Tum 'TISRE' Ko kyun Khada Kar Rahe Ho' ?
Tote ne sex ki goli kha li or garam ho gaya,
malik ne use thanda karne k liye freezer mei rakh diya
20 min. bad usne darwaza khola to tota pasine mei duba hua tha..
Malik:abe tujhe itna pasina q aya hua hai ?
Tota:Haramkhor tujhe kya malum jami hui murgi ki tange kholna kitna mushkil kam hai.
SHARABI cinema hall me achanak chillaya-Mera Lund kahan gaya
Mera Lund kaha gaya
GirL-chup hoja SAALE,.
Tera hath meri PANTI me Hai.
Clean Poem:
Vo soti rahi mai karta raha,
-Intzaar us ke jawab ka;
Abhi uske haath me rakha hi tha ke gir gaya,
-Phool sunder gulab ka;
Usne kaha pichhe se nhi aage se karo,
Deedar mere husn-a-shabab ka.
Usne kaha bda mja ata hai jab ander jata hai,
kano me ek ek lafz tere pyar ka...
Shadi ki 1st nyt
Dulha-Hmesha Puja krna,
vrat rkhna,
daan dena
sbse pyar se bolna!
Dulhan pareshan ho k bahar gyi or boli-sb andr ajao,SATSANG ho rha h!!:D
Its amazin how 3 words can completely change ur day
-i love u
-u didnt pass
-we r done
-i hate u
-facebook login error
Probably last 1 hurts d most.
When WORDS fail, eyes speak. When eyes fail,"HEART" speaks. When HEART fails, nothing speaks they put cotton in the nose...
-
A fantastic quote for life time:-
"Satisfy the person who expect a smile frm U..
&
Surprise the person who never expected anything frm U"..
When WORDS fail, eyes speak. When eyes fail,"HEART" speaks. When HEART fails, nothing speaks they put cotton in the nose...
-
Profesr:Aj Pehli Bar Tum Class Me Bate Kr Rhe Ho Humesa Tum Nazre Jhuka K Meri Bate Sunte The,
Kya Ho Gya Hai Tumhe,
Stdnt:Sir Aj Mera SMS Pck Khatm Ho Gya Hai.
Figure Freak Bhikarin: Babuji 1 rupya dede 3 din se bhuki hun.
Babuji: 3 din se bhuki hai toh 1 rupye ka kya karegi?
Bhikarin: dekhungi kitna weight kam hua.:-)
Aaj kal har shaqs hume jindgi kaise jiye ye sikha jata h..
Unhe kaun samjhaye k
"Kuch khwab adhure hain hamaare.."
Varna Humse behtar jeena kise aata hai
Mis u all
As people see my msgs they think i'm addicted 2 msging
But actualy
I'm adicted in holding relationships.:-)
Qk 'har ek friend ZAROORI hota hai';)
In an African Safari,A LION suddenly bounced on Joker's wife.
WIFE-Shoot him! Shoot him!
JOKER-Yes Yes.I'm changing d battery of my camera
People Say To Me
"Sudhar Jao, Improvement Lao"
How To Tell Them-
"There's No Scope 0f
Improvement In Perfection"..!
Its amazin how 3 words can completely change ur day
-i love u
-u didnt pass
-we r done
-i hate u
-facebook login error
Probably last 1 hurts d most.
Us bewafa ko na aya hamari wafa ka yaken
Humne kaha hum mar jayenge or usne kaha
'marja'
fir
( ._.)
<) )
_//
fir kya
bejti ho gyi.
Figure Freak Bhikarin: Babuji 1 rupya dede 3 din se bhuki hun.
Babuji: 3 din se bhuki hai toh 1 rupye ka kya karegi?
Bhikarin: dekhungi kitna weight kam hua.:-)
Aap Se To?
Customer Care Best.
Bcoz,
Daily
4 Msg,
2 Call,
Wohi Kardete He.
Aur Aap?
1Call Nahi?
1Msg Nahi?
1Miss Call Tak Nahi?
Haso Mat.
sharm aani chahiye
Shadi ki 1st nyt
Dulha-Hmesha Puja krna,
vrat rkhna,
daan dena
sbse pyar se bolna!
Dulhan pareshan ho k bahar gyi or boli-sb andr ajao,SATSANG ho rha h!!:D
Engg. 2 Dr - Dr. Main apni BV ko chodta hu, To andar jake lund teda ho jata hai. .
Dr. ko yakin nahi aata to Engg. Apni BV ko clinic me lekr Dr. k samne chodta hai. .
Kuch din baad kisi shaadi me Dr.Apne dosto k 7 khada us Engg. ka mazak uda raha hota hai k is bewkuf ne apni BV ko mere samne c(@da. .
Dusri taraf wo Engg. apne dosto k 7 khada Dr. ko dekh k hasta hai Or kehta hai - Yaar randi laya tha, Jagah nai mili to iske clinic me jakar chod aaya. .
Clean Poem:
Vo soti rahi mai karta raha,
-Intzaar us ke jawab ka;
Abhi uske haath me rakha hi tha ke gir gaya,
-Phool sunder gulab ka;
Usne kaha pichhe se nhi aage se karo,
Deedar mere husn-a-shabab ka.
Usne kaha bda mja ata hai jab ander jata hai,
kano me ek ek lafz tere pyar ka...
Profesr:Aj Pehli Bar Tum Class Me Bate Kr Rhe Ho Humesa Tum Nazre Jhuka K Meri Bate Sunte The,
Kya Ho Gya Hai Tumhe,
Stdnt:Sir Aj Mera SMS Pck Khatm Ho Gya Hai.
Beautiful question to the God...
Teri is duniya me
ye manjar kyun h?
Kahin zakhm to
kahin peeth me
khanzar kyun h?
Suna hai ki tu har
zarre me h rahta,
To fir zami par kahi
Maszid Kahi Mandir
kyun hai?
Jab rehne wale is duniya ke hai tere hi bande,
To fir koi kisi ka dost, aur koi
dusman kyun hai.
Tu hi likhta h sab logo ka mukaddr,
To fir koi badnasib.
aur koi mukaddr ka
sikandar kyun hai?
A fantastic quote for life time:-
"Satisfy the person who expect a smile frm U..
&
Surprise the person who never expected anything frm U"..
Husband seting paswrd 4 his Laptop,
Wid wife siting beside him.
he types"BRAIN" as pasword.
Wife fel off her chair Laughin
Coz PC rplied
"TOO SMALL":-D
HiFiXpress:
Santa ek Baarat me gya
Waha use baar-baar PAANI parosa ja rha tha
Preshan hokr Santa chillaya: Gale me paani fas gya h, thode "RASGULE DO"
Teacher-Calcium kish dudh m hai ?Boy:18 sal ki ladki k dudh m kyoki ispe muh lgao to jism k un hiso m b jaan aa jati hai jisme haddi nhi hoti...
Kaash Me
Tumhe Dekhu
Jab Tum
Kapde Utaro
Jo Dale The
Taar Pe
Sukhne K Liye
Aur
Tum
Apne Haath Me
Pakdo Mera
Haath
Aur Kaho,
Mene Tumhare Liye
Kholi Hui Hai
Apni
Baahein
Ab To
Lelo Meri
Har Khushi
Aur
Mujhe Dedo Apna
Har gam
Phir Me
Kholu Dhire Se
Tumhari
Eyes
Aur Kahu,
Dekho Kitna
Bada He Mera
Dil
Phir Me
Tumhari
Taangen Uthaon
Aur
Daal Doon Apna
Lund
Beta Har Baar
Majak Nahi Hota,
Non Veg joke Hai..
Majak thode hi he koi.
Husband seting paswrd 4 his Laptop,
Wid wife siting beside him.
he types"BRAIN" as pasword.
Wife fel off her chair Laughin
Coz PC rplied
"TOO SMALL":-D
Boy to girl- Tum nahaati nahi ho kya?
Girl-Mai to roz nahaati hoon..But tumne aisa kyun puchha.?
Boy-"Kabhi dekha nahi na isliye puchha.
Kaash Me
Tumhe Dekhu
Jab Tum
Kapde Utaro
Jo Dale The
Taar Pe
Sukhne K Liye
Aur
Tum
Apne Haath Me
Pakdo Mera
Haath
Aur Kaho,
Mene Tumhare Liye
Kholi Hui Hai
Apni
Baahein
Ab To
Lelo Meri
Har Khushi
Aur
Mujhe Dedo Apna
Har gam
Phir Me
Kholu Dhire Se
Tumhari
Eyes
Aur Kahu,
Dekho Kitna
Bada He Mera
Dil
Phir Me
Tumhari
Taangen Uthaon
Aur
Daal Doon Apna
Lund
Beta Har Baar
Majak Nahi Hota,
Non Veg joke Hai..
Majak thode hi he koi.
Life is very funny
Sumthing u luv d most can turn into sumthing u hate d most in life!
4 example,set ur favourite song as the alarm ringtone..:-D
MAThS PJ..
Usne na ki Meri Mohabat ki kadr,
wah wah
Usne na ki Meri Mohabat ki kadr,
To maine b soch liya:
2 PARALLEL LINES NEVER INTERSECT EACH OTHER...:-D
Engg. 2 Dr - Dr. Main apni BV ko chodta hu, To andar jake lund teda ho jata hai. .
Dr. ko yakin nahi aata to Engg. Apni BV ko clinic me lekr Dr. k samne chodta hai. .
Kuch din baad kisi shaadi me Dr.Apne dosto k 7 khada us Engg. ka mazak uda raha hota hai k is bewkuf ne apni BV ko mere samne c(@da. .
Dusri taraf wo Engg. apne dosto k 7 khada Dr. ko dekh k hasta hai Or kehta hai - Yaar randi laya tha, Jagah nai mili to iske clinic me jakar chod aaya. .
Ishq Ke SCOOL Me Naya Mahol Tayyar Ho Gya PAPPU Ki Girlfriend Se Poori CLASS Ko PYAR Ho Gya Bus Tabhi Se PAPPU Udas Ho Gya Poori CLASS Fail OR PAPPU Pass HO Gya
HiFiXpress:
Santa ek Baarat me gya
Waha use baar-baar PAANI parosa ja rha tha
Preshan hokr Santa chillaya: Gale me paani fas gya h, thode "RASGULE DO"
Teacher-Calcium kish dudh m hai ?Boy:18 sal ki ladki k dudh m kyoki ispe muh lgao to jism k un hiso m b jaan aa jati hai jisme haddi nhi hoti...
A boy Writes an essay on breast. Ans : Breasts are most wonderful multi-purpose creation of nature. They produce milk which is good for health. We can Suck them as a mouth freshner. By Putting the face in between the two we can relax ourselves. They are comfortable, soft pillow for sound sleep. Their look brings the penis immediately in to action. Women use breasts as a blackmailing instrument, they show half of it nd men die 2 c d remaining half.:-P
Sardar ne beti ke room me cigaret dekha,
o god she smoke,
wisky dekha,
o god she drink,
fir ladka dekha,
THANK GOD ye Sab iska hai.;)
